Wishing you the best of luck with your driving tests, Anne. 

I admit...I am not the most, or rather, 'suitable' person to talk with when it concerns emotions....and all those sorts of feelings,

...and the fact that "cheer up" sounds rather superficial when written down or spoken with my words is another down point...

but Anne, remember, whilst 'going forward','experiencing new things' and 'never looking back' are all good things that you should keep doing, going 'back' towards your home may not be filled with that dread that is eating you up when you return there, 

maybe you'd sit in that same room, see all the reminders which made you sad and angry, and, instead of feeling those same strong negative emotions over again, you'd experience it to a lesser degree. 

I don't really know how to explain it, but whilst you experience that 'sadness and anger' to a lesser degree...maybe you'd find something else mixed in there,

nostalgia, 

hatred,

loneliness,

and perhaps that tiny piece of peace from within.

you are not who you were before Anne, that personality of the 'past' may still be there, but it has been built upon has it not? built upon by all those new experiences, new friends, new responsibilities, thoughts and actions to form 'you' of now,

so don't fear 'home', Anne,

'home', your 'past', will remain 'what' it was, 'when' it was, and 'how' it was, because 'home' is an unchanging variable,

but 'who' you were and 'who' you are now, certainly has changed. This change, or your 'perspective' has 'power' to repaint 'home' from 'what it was' into 'what is shall be now'. 

have courage. 

Oh yes, before I forget, one final note to kenji, 

the fact that you are even considering thoughts of 'guilt' and 'what it is to be a bad person' constitutes to the fact that you aren't one, no?

I am afraid to say that this may be necessary;

you idiot! stop doubting yourself,

kenji is kenji.

kenji will not turn into a bad person that easily,

but kenji is human,

and humans don't like suffering alone,

that's why,

something like wishing disaster to befall another person,

isn't enough to make you a 'bad person'

I repeat again;

you idiot!