nobody understands. I'm just being an unappreciative brat, it's exactly cause I'm always asking for too much, I should just be fucking quiet and "enjoy" my fucking solitude, lack of internet and basically lack of ANYTHING whatsoever.
It's not like I'm leaving my parents, or becoming poor as fuck, or frankly having everything around me crash into oblivion, nono, it's not like that at all. Because nobody can seem to give a fuck about what I'm going through, more practically the one who should be giving the biggest fuck, doesn't seem to understand at all.
How about I just kill myself so nobody will fucking have to put up with me anymore? Would that satisfy everyone and everything? Or how about I just disappear off the face of the earth? Would that help? you're running out of patience, I ran out of it months ago, yet I still have to fake being happy and being ok JUST TO PLEASE YOU, JUST TO PLEASE EVERYONE. I'M SO FUCKING UNHAPPY ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT'S GOING ON, I just choose to keep quiet.
Every now and then IF I CHOOSE TO FUCKING BE EMOTIONAL/DEPRESSED/OR FUCKING MOODY, CAN'T YOU FUCKING HAVE SOME DECENCY TO ACT LIKE YOU GIVE A FUCK INSTEAD OF THROWING SHIT BACK AT ME? GOD, THIS IS WHY I DON'T FUCKING TELL ANYONE ANYTHING ANYMORE.
I'm done faking everything, I'm not contented with my life the way it is and is going to be. I'm done faking my unhappiness, I'm done faking that everything is ok just so people don't have to worry. I'm FUCKING DONE. Sick and tired of having to withhold my anger, by all means if you want to act like I'm ungrateful, I'LL FUCKING START ACTING LIKE THAT. Countless of times I TOLD YOU I SHOULD FIND ANOTHER ROOM SOMEWHERE ELSE, IF YOU CAN'T EVEN TOLERATE ME WITH SOME PATIENCE WTF IS THE POINT OF IT? I MIGHT AS WELL BE HOMELESS RIGHT?.
I GIVE UP BEING THE PERFECT POSTER CHILD OF GOOD BEHAVIOUR. DONE DONE DONE DONE DONE.
Done.
